On the encouragement of my friend Caleb at (Love.Think.Speak. ) Blog I am starting my own. This first post is an allegory I wrote which was sparked by his post called "Fear". Go check it out and thanks for reading.....

So Much Afraid


Through many trials and labors have I made it to my destination. Upon your word I have left the comfort of your golden, fortified, city where peace and truth dwell as light both night and day.

I am here. I now dwell in the enemy’s camp. My only life line, this secret manifesto which I write and your orders upon which I await my opportunity to engage.

It is dark here. A thick, foul, fog obscures everything. Would that it could, it would creep into my very soul to transform from the inside out the perception of my surroundings. I stand in its midst holding my breath against its oozing onslaught.

The ramparts and battlements rise to scrape the very clouds of heaven. I must close my eye at the sight merely to be able to remember any light at all.

Nothing could have prepared me for what I found here. As desolate and decrepit a place as this is I can tell no difference between us. They look the same as we do; in everyway, copies of ourselves missing but one thing. Who can tell with mortal eye friend from foe?

One studies closely the ways of this people and one must know that he is being studied. “Be on your guard,” you said, “You will be in the enemy’s camp, but become not of the enemy.”

I know now the struggle to which your words alluded for the habits of this place seep in through every joint and seam of my armor. Yet I resist. My hope; that the hour of my appointment not tarry. I am so much afraid.

Fear is the cloak we all seem to wear here. This is the camouflage that keeps me undetected. Knowing freedom is just beyond the fog bank grows less and less a help as the time passes.

Come to me thou prey and I shall free you by the death of your fear to the light of truth. Come to me you called and appointed, you chosen of the master. Come to me out of the darkness.

As my very soul becomes inundated, drown by the prevailing current and tide I spot them; the appointed. I lye in wait deteriorating and clinging to hope when the moment arrives.

Has it been too long? Can I now remove this cloak that has woven its self to me?
How can I fulfill the objective now bound by the same chains they wear proudly?
I cannot even begin now to remove it. There is no hope left in me. I close my eyes.

“Bear all!” My mind recalls your words of instruction on the day of my leaving.
“Bear all in the face of fear!” The warm glow of a ridiculous notion begins to flourish in my heart.
“Bear all in the face of fear and the light of truth will bring freedom to the captive!”

As they approach this huddled mass I strip away the cloak, that has now become an iatrical part of my appearance, with all the little bit of strength I have. It tears every stitch and seam. Cloth and binding now unfettered fly to the fog and I stand, bare in the face of fear.

In amazement the captive come drawn to me not by the spectacle of naked shame, but by the light shown forth from the truth that freedom from the cloak of fear has revealed.

David Mayo